Warrior, Priest, and Fire
The last two and a half weeks have been hard. I sat with my dear friend as he walked through pain, confusion, and fear while he was prepared for, and went through, open heart surgery. It is a fire I wish he hadn’t had to go through, but I also know that if he hadn’t, he probably wouldn’t be here right now.
But because I, and several others, were willing to walk through this fire with him, he was not alone. There’s still a lot of healing to be done for him right now and a lot of processing we will need to do together. We are family, all of us: we will do what is needed together.
For me, helping him woke up parts of me that I wasn’t sure I could handle, much less do. The Warrior came out and did whatever it took to get him the best care possible. The part of me that is Crow was stern when necessary, but knew when to back off. I had no problems confronting people when I had to, and doing it in a way that was also a lesson for the other person. Even though the old fears were in the back of my head, I did what I had to anyway, because there was no one else in that moment.
I had to Priest in so many ways. Even some ways I wasn’t expecting. I’ve experienced sitting vigil in the hospital and volunteer to do such work. Yet, I felt like the Priest part of myself was stretched and pushed into places I didn’t know I could hold. But I did. I had to.
And I would do it all over again.
When I think of Fire, I see it as a purification, a cleansing, burning away that which is not needed anymore, and bringing you more of your true self. I think I can safely say that all of us have gone through this in the last two weeks, and while we’re not done yet, I know that Spirit has shown us what we are truly capable of.
It is a wondrous thing. It really is.